The Roaches Know

Here's something I read today on how roaches obviously understand game theory. Roaches know you've gotta raise with a variety of holdings. That's why they've been around for so long. If roaches only raised when they had good cards they'd be long gone. Like the dinosaurs.

Dinosaurs are great to have at the poker table because they're so predictable and that sort of play will make you extinct. But not the roaches. When you're playing poker against a roach you never know if he's got pocket aces or 3,6 off.

Push Ups

Raising is difficult to do but good for you. The more I raise, the more chips I acquire. When I raise with mediocre holdings it disturbs everyone at the table. Kind of like I'm breaking the rules.

People tell me how poorly I play but I've got to keep raising because I need to take care of myself. If the object of poker was to lose weight then raising would be like exercising. I gotta get my workout in.

Calling isn't so good for your health. Calling is like when you're hungry and go to a movie and end up eating too much popcorn. Afterwards you feel sick and your body is all confused whether you are hungry or not because you haven't had a real meal but you are full of popcorn and butter and salt. That's exactly what calling is.

Folding is fine too. Absolutely. In any situation. Don't let anyone ever tell you in life that you have to eat the popcorn when you really want dinner. Go eat. Besides the movie will eventually come out on pay per view and the truth is it's probably not as good as everyone says it is unless you were in that first batch of people to see it. You know. Back when there weren't any expectations. But now? With all that hype? There's no way that film can be good.

Getting Back In The Flow

I haven't played nearly enough poker since leaving Las Vegas in August.

How much isn't enough?

-Once at Harrahs Rincon near San Diego in September.

-A second time at the Blerge in Brooklyn in October.

-A third time at some card room in Northern California in December.

And that's it.

I did however get back into the online scene this week after getting a small transfer on Full Tilt from Check Raise Chin.

My first action was Monday night. I stayed within my bankroll like a good human being by entering a $2.25 tournament. There were 436 players and I came in 1st place.

What does this mean?

Now I get to play in $4 dollar tourneys!

What would Larry David do?

I have 42 poker books book sitting on my shelf and that's not even counting my autographed copy of T.J. Cloutier's Hold 'Em book that my friend Joe borrowed from me back in 2005.

Lets say I were to visit Joe's home and while meeting his baby daughter for the first time I notice T.J.'s book sitting in the living room. Can I just take it back? Or do I have to ask for permission first?

What if I haven't bought his daughter a gift yet? Can I just give her the T.J. Cloutier book? What does Miss Manners say to do here? How about Martha Stewart? From what I've read OJ Simpson says to take the book. That much I know. (Cause I like to read.)

The Pros and the Cons

One benefit to not gambling for a living anymore is I don't have to worry about finding myself a lucky outfit to wear when I wake up in the morning.